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The Complete Fic Directory
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Red
“How do you feel about red?” the chipper voice of Mark Owen asked from the depths of the wardrobe. Gary frowned. He was stood next to a growing mountain of ties that had formed at his feet and he looked uncertainly into the wardrobe as Mark continued to pull out scarves and ties and jackets in a seemingly random order. Howard and Jason were sat across the room, lounging idly, as they had been for the past ten minutes, and offering Gary no help at all in dealing with Mark’s sudden style drive.
“You wanna be careful Gaz, last time he said that I ended up in stripy trousers,” Jason commented, not looking up from his newspaper. Howard rolled his eyes.
“I can’t believe you’re still moaning about that Jay! We all know you loved ‘em! You just used them as another way of chatting up the dancers,” he said with a chuckle.
“Don’t forget though Dougie, Jay uses everything as a way of chatting up the dancers,” Gary put in dryly and Howard laughed.
“He has a point Jay,” he commented as Jason frowned and put down his paper.
“I can’t help it if I’m the only one in this band who can carry off stripy trousers! You lot are all just jealous,” he concluded with a sly smile.
At that moment, Mark emerged from the wardrobe, a red tie clutched victoriously in his hand.
“This one,” he said to Gary, handing it over. Gary frowned but duly took the tie from Mark.
“You still haven’t told me why you’ve dragged me up here for a makeover! It’s just a night out with the wives,” Gary sighed, fiddling with the tie which was already around his neck.
“Dawn wanted to make sure her man looked just as sweet and beautiful as Emma’s man does,” Mark said with a broad grin and Gary simply rolled his eyes.
“Never gonna happen mate, they don’t come much sweeter than Mark Owen…there’s internet poles about it and everything,” Howard remarked and the other three looked at him strangely.
“Howard mate, you have to stop Googling Mark – it’s starting to get weird,” Gary smirked.
“Aw, he can’t help it that I’m made out of sugar and spice and all things nice – I’m just amazing,” Mark grinned mischievously.
“Modest too,” Howard commented.
“Isn’t that what the Powerpuff Girls are made out of…” Gary put in with a frown at Mark.
“I’m staying out of this conversation,” Jason laughed, shaking his head and turning his gaze back to his paper.
“So, now you know it’s for Dawn will you please trust me and wear the red?” Mark asked, whipping away the tie Gary was wearing and starting to tug the red one from Gary’s hand.
“It may well all be for Dawn, but you still haven’t explained to me why we need the presence of Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee over there,” Gary said, jabbing a thumb in Jason and Howard’s direction. Jason looked up with a small frown but Howard pulled a shocked expression.
“What, you mean this isn’t my house?!” he joked, looking around in exaggerated surprise. Jason looked at him steadily for a moment then looked back over at Gary.
“I hope he’s the dumb one,” he said simply then returned to his paper. Gary couldn’t help but laugh.
“Come on Gaz, say you’ll wear the tie!” Mark pleaded after a pause, starting to tie the red tie into place and looking up at Gary with a childish pout.
“What’s in it for me exactly,” Gary questioned with a raised eyebrow and Mark rolled his eyes.
“I managed to get you the best babysitter in the business…” he replied, waving his arms in Jason’s direction. Jason smiled slightly, looking up as Howard waved jazz-hands at him.
“You sure you can handle two lots of kids mate…one of them is Elwood…” Gary teased and Mark hit him playfully on the arm.
“Oi! That’s my little boy you’re talking about!” he protested but Gary just shrugged.
“I think that’s what Gary was worried about,” Howard grinned mischievously.
“If I can put up with you lot on a daily basis then I can definitely handle your kids for a night. Go on Gaz, go, have a good time! And for God’s sake wear the red tie or we’ll all be paying the price next time Mark wants his own way! “ Jason smiled gently, rolling his eyes at Mark.
“I can give him a reference if it’d help,” Howard suggested, a playful twinkle in his eyes.
“I’ve got my guitar so that’s Elwood dealt with and then Dan and Emily will be happy with my company – they are only human after all. I’ll brainwash ‘em with a few Take That DVDs if it reassures you any,” Jason added with a soft chuckle.
“Are they old enough for Do What You Like?” Howard teased and Jason swotted him with the newspaper.
“Watch it you or I’ll show Do What You Like to Grace next time you need some last minute babysitting!” he threatened, his smile too warm to take him seriously.
“I take it back Gaz, he ain’t got no reference from me, abandon your night out!” Howard beamed.
“Hang on…you’ve brought your guitar? You’re not going to teach them Wooden Boat are you?” Gary groaned. Howard and Mark laughed but Jason shrugged casually, a playful smile on his lips.
“Should’ve been a single,” he protested softly, looking self-consciously down at his paper. Gary simply shook his head, smiling affectionately at his friend.
“Arrogant git,” he joked, a warm glint in his eyes.
A soft knock at the door interrupted them and they all turned to look as Dawn popped her head around and smiled.
“I hate to interrupt your sleepover boys but me and Emma are getting a little bored,” she said softly, her blonde hair swishing slightly as she shook her head at them.
“Sorry love…Mark and me will be down in a minute. Promise,” Gary replied. Dawn nodded, then cast her eyes over Jason and Howard. Jason smiled at her charmingly, making her laugh, then she looked thoughtfully at Howard.
“Don’t you have a flight to Germany first thing tomorrow?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.
“Don’t worry Dawn, I’m heading home any minute. The kids are all Jay’s tonight too so you don’t have to worry – everything will run to perfect time and there’ll probably even be cookies in the oven when you get back,” Howard said swiftly and Dawn couldn’t help but laugh at him. She shook her head, waving a teasingly dismissive hand at them before leaving the room. Jason still looked mildly affronted as Howard and Mark continued to chuckle at Howard’s joke.
“Face it Jay, no one can compete with your level of domestication,” Gary laughed gently.
“Organisation...my level of organisation,” Jason corrected, unable to hide quiet smile in his voice.
As Gary finished tying his tie, a cry erupted from the other side of the house. Gary moved to leave the room but Jason put a hand up to stop him.
“Don’t! I’ll go, you go off to your night out. Enjoy it Barlow…and you owe me,” Jason grinned, chucking his paper at Howard playfully and disappearing from the room. The crying was subdued in seconds and Gary shook his head, mystified.
“How does he do that?” he asked and Mark looked up at Gary with grin.
“Told you. Best in the business. Now come on Barlow, I’m starving!” he said, flicking his hair out of his eyes and planting his hat firmly onto his head.
“You’re always starving,” Gary muttered as they left the room.
They went down to join Emma and Dawn in the hallway, Howard following them.
“You look gorgeous!” Emma beamed kindly at Gary.
"Aww you're too kind!" Howard joked and Gary elbowed him in his side.
“Don't worry love, you look gorgeous too,” Dawn teased, linking her arm through Gary’s and taking in his smartened up appearance.
“Have fun…I’ll see you when I get back from Germany,” Howard called after them as they finally left the house.
By the time they got home, Gary had to admit he’d had a good time. He didn’t like to go out that often but he was grateful for Dawn and Mark’s coaxing and he’d definitely had fun. As they came into the house, he loosened his tie slightly and called out for Jason. When there was no response he frowned and they all made for the lounge. Sure enough, there Jason was, stretched out on the sofa with Elwood lying down, sound asleep, on his chest. Howard too was still there, fast asleep in the armchair, his head slumped forwards onto his chest.
“Sorry guys, didn’t want to wake him,” Jason said softly when he saw them all come in.
“Aw, bless,” Dawn beamed as she took in the sight.
“I know, adorable isn’t he,” Jason joked, nodding his head in Howard’s direction before carefully standing up and handing the still-sleeping Elwood over to Mark.
“Was he any trouble?” Mark asked as he took the boy from Jason and Jason simply smiled.
“Nah, he was just having trouble sleeping so I gave him a quick cuddle and he was out like light,” he replied, giving Elwood’s hair a quick ruffle.
“And what about that one?” Emma smiled impishly, pointing to Howard. Jason laughed.
“Pretty much the same story actually,” he chuckled.
“Thanks again mate, we owe you,” Gary said through a yawn, patting Jason’s shoulder.
“No worries. Willow and Daisy are upstairs sleeping if you want to check on them…and Dan and Emily went off a while ago too but they demanded you give ‘em a kiss when you got in,” Jason replied, still stroking at Elwood’s hair affectionately.
“Their wish is my command,” Gary nodded slowly and Mark laughed. Jason, however, glanced across at Howard who was still sleeping peacefully in the armchair.
“I suppose I should wake him up and establish if he’s actually packed or not…” he sighed after a moment. Mark smiled and tilted his head to one side.
“He won’t be you know,” he grinned.
“He’s Howard, of course he won’t be,” Jason added with a roll of his eyes.
Dawn and Emma exchanged a glance.
“Well, whilst you deal with him, perhaps we should go and deal with the kids,” Dawn said and Emma nodded, moving towards the door. Dawn began to walk away too, pausing only to press a lingering kiss on Gary’s cheek, leaving a small, red lipstick mark behind.
“Told you red was your colour,” Mark chuckled as Dawn closed the door behind her and Jason laughed. Gary simply rolled his eyes.
“I don’t think I’ll be sticking to your advice with this one mate,” he said, rubbing at his cheek self-consciously. A yawn then interrupted their banter.
“I swear you only just left,” Howard said tiredly as Mark, Gary and Jason all turned to face him.
“You may want to check a clock on that one mate,” Gary replied as Howard pulled himself to his feet and came to join the other three men.
“Gaz…is that lipstick?” Howard frowned.
When Emma returned with Willow in her arms, they all made their way to the door once more. Each of the men gave Emma a polite kiss on the cheek as she bid them goodnight before she swiftly went out to put Willow in the car. Gary then turned to the three men left in his hallway, offering out his arms as an invite for one of them to take the first hug of goodnight. But instead the three men exchanged a playful glance, stepping forward as one.
“Mwah!” they exclaimed in perfect harmony, each blowing him a kiss before collapsing into laughter. Try as he might Gary couldn’t hold back his own smirk. Eventually, they relented, each embracing him with a warm ‘Goodnight’ and finally heading out to their cars.
“Red is definitely your colour Gaz,” Mark beamed jokingly over Gary’s shoulder before he too walked away.
“You wanna be careful Gaz, last time he said that I ended up in stripy trousers,” Jason commented, not looking up from his newspaper. Howard rolled his eyes.
“I can’t believe you’re still moaning about that Jay! We all know you loved ‘em! You just used them as another way of chatting up the dancers,” he said with a chuckle.
“Don’t forget though Dougie, Jay uses everything as a way of chatting up the dancers,” Gary put in dryly and Howard laughed.
“He has a point Jay,” he commented as Jason frowned and put down his paper.
“I can’t help it if I’m the only one in this band who can carry off stripy trousers! You lot are all just jealous,” he concluded with a sly smile.
At that moment, Mark emerged from the wardrobe, a red tie clutched victoriously in his hand.
“This one,” he said to Gary, handing it over. Gary frowned but duly took the tie from Mark.
“You still haven’t told me why you’ve dragged me up here for a makeover! It’s just a night out with the wives,” Gary sighed, fiddling with the tie which was already around his neck.
“Dawn wanted to make sure her man looked just as sweet and beautiful as Emma’s man does,” Mark said with a broad grin and Gary simply rolled his eyes.
“Never gonna happen mate, they don’t come much sweeter than Mark Owen…there’s internet poles about it and everything,” Howard remarked and the other three looked at him strangely.
“Howard mate, you have to stop Googling Mark – it’s starting to get weird,” Gary smirked.
“Aw, he can’t help it that I’m made out of sugar and spice and all things nice – I’m just amazing,” Mark grinned mischievously.
“Modest too,” Howard commented.
“Isn’t that what the Powerpuff Girls are made out of…” Gary put in with a frown at Mark.
“I’m staying out of this conversation,” Jason laughed, shaking his head and turning his gaze back to his paper.
“So, now you know it’s for Dawn will you please trust me and wear the red?” Mark asked, whipping away the tie Gary was wearing and starting to tug the red one from Gary’s hand.
“It may well all be for Dawn, but you still haven’t explained to me why we need the presence of Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee over there,” Gary said, jabbing a thumb in Jason and Howard’s direction. Jason looked up with a small frown but Howard pulled a shocked expression.
“What, you mean this isn’t my house?!” he joked, looking around in exaggerated surprise. Jason looked at him steadily for a moment then looked back over at Gary.
“I hope he’s the dumb one,” he said simply then returned to his paper. Gary couldn’t help but laugh.
“Come on Gaz, say you’ll wear the tie!” Mark pleaded after a pause, starting to tie the red tie into place and looking up at Gary with a childish pout.
“What’s in it for me exactly,” Gary questioned with a raised eyebrow and Mark rolled his eyes.
“I managed to get you the best babysitter in the business…” he replied, waving his arms in Jason’s direction. Jason smiled slightly, looking up as Howard waved jazz-hands at him.
“You sure you can handle two lots of kids mate…one of them is Elwood…” Gary teased and Mark hit him playfully on the arm.
“Oi! That’s my little boy you’re talking about!” he protested but Gary just shrugged.
“I think that’s what Gary was worried about,” Howard grinned mischievously.
“If I can put up with you lot on a daily basis then I can definitely handle your kids for a night. Go on Gaz, go, have a good time! And for God’s sake wear the red tie or we’ll all be paying the price next time Mark wants his own way! “ Jason smiled gently, rolling his eyes at Mark.
“I can give him a reference if it’d help,” Howard suggested, a playful twinkle in his eyes.
“I’ve got my guitar so that’s Elwood dealt with and then Dan and Emily will be happy with my company – they are only human after all. I’ll brainwash ‘em with a few Take That DVDs if it reassures you any,” Jason added with a soft chuckle.
“Are they old enough for Do What You Like?” Howard teased and Jason swotted him with the newspaper.
“Watch it you or I’ll show Do What You Like to Grace next time you need some last minute babysitting!” he threatened, his smile too warm to take him seriously.
“I take it back Gaz, he ain’t got no reference from me, abandon your night out!” Howard beamed.
“Hang on…you’ve brought your guitar? You’re not going to teach them Wooden Boat are you?” Gary groaned. Howard and Mark laughed but Jason shrugged casually, a playful smile on his lips.
“Should’ve been a single,” he protested softly, looking self-consciously down at his paper. Gary simply shook his head, smiling affectionately at his friend.
“Arrogant git,” he joked, a warm glint in his eyes.
A soft knock at the door interrupted them and they all turned to look as Dawn popped her head around and smiled.
“I hate to interrupt your sleepover boys but me and Emma are getting a little bored,” she said softly, her blonde hair swishing slightly as she shook her head at them.
“Sorry love…Mark and me will be down in a minute. Promise,” Gary replied. Dawn nodded, then cast her eyes over Jason and Howard. Jason smiled at her charmingly, making her laugh, then she looked thoughtfully at Howard.
“Don’t you have a flight to Germany first thing tomorrow?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.
“Don’t worry Dawn, I’m heading home any minute. The kids are all Jay’s tonight too so you don’t have to worry – everything will run to perfect time and there’ll probably even be cookies in the oven when you get back,” Howard said swiftly and Dawn couldn’t help but laugh at him. She shook her head, waving a teasingly dismissive hand at them before leaving the room. Jason still looked mildly affronted as Howard and Mark continued to chuckle at Howard’s joke.
“Face it Jay, no one can compete with your level of domestication,” Gary laughed gently.
“Organisation...my level of organisation,” Jason corrected, unable to hide quiet smile in his voice.
As Gary finished tying his tie, a cry erupted from the other side of the house. Gary moved to leave the room but Jason put a hand up to stop him.
“Don’t! I’ll go, you go off to your night out. Enjoy it Barlow…and you owe me,” Jason grinned, chucking his paper at Howard playfully and disappearing from the room. The crying was subdued in seconds and Gary shook his head, mystified.
“How does he do that?” he asked and Mark looked up at Gary with grin.
“Told you. Best in the business. Now come on Barlow, I’m starving!” he said, flicking his hair out of his eyes and planting his hat firmly onto his head.
“You’re always starving,” Gary muttered as they left the room.
They went down to join Emma and Dawn in the hallway, Howard following them.
“You look gorgeous!” Emma beamed kindly at Gary.
"Aww you're too kind!" Howard joked and Gary elbowed him in his side.
“Don't worry love, you look gorgeous too,” Dawn teased, linking her arm through Gary’s and taking in his smartened up appearance.
“Have fun…I’ll see you when I get back from Germany,” Howard called after them as they finally left the house.
By the time they got home, Gary had to admit he’d had a good time. He didn’t like to go out that often but he was grateful for Dawn and Mark’s coaxing and he’d definitely had fun. As they came into the house, he loosened his tie slightly and called out for Jason. When there was no response he frowned and they all made for the lounge. Sure enough, there Jason was, stretched out on the sofa with Elwood lying down, sound asleep, on his chest. Howard too was still there, fast asleep in the armchair, his head slumped forwards onto his chest.
“Sorry guys, didn’t want to wake him,” Jason said softly when he saw them all come in.
“Aw, bless,” Dawn beamed as she took in the sight.
“I know, adorable isn’t he,” Jason joked, nodding his head in Howard’s direction before carefully standing up and handing the still-sleeping Elwood over to Mark.
“Was he any trouble?” Mark asked as he took the boy from Jason and Jason simply smiled.
“Nah, he was just having trouble sleeping so I gave him a quick cuddle and he was out like light,” he replied, giving Elwood’s hair a quick ruffle.
“And what about that one?” Emma smiled impishly, pointing to Howard. Jason laughed.
“Pretty much the same story actually,” he chuckled.
“Thanks again mate, we owe you,” Gary said through a yawn, patting Jason’s shoulder.
“No worries. Willow and Daisy are upstairs sleeping if you want to check on them…and Dan and Emily went off a while ago too but they demanded you give ‘em a kiss when you got in,” Jason replied, still stroking at Elwood’s hair affectionately.
“Their wish is my command,” Gary nodded slowly and Mark laughed. Jason, however, glanced across at Howard who was still sleeping peacefully in the armchair.
“I suppose I should wake him up and establish if he’s actually packed or not…” he sighed after a moment. Mark smiled and tilted his head to one side.
“He won’t be you know,” he grinned.
“He’s Howard, of course he won’t be,” Jason added with a roll of his eyes.
Dawn and Emma exchanged a glance.
“Well, whilst you deal with him, perhaps we should go and deal with the kids,” Dawn said and Emma nodded, moving towards the door. Dawn began to walk away too, pausing only to press a lingering kiss on Gary’s cheek, leaving a small, red lipstick mark behind.
“Told you red was your colour,” Mark chuckled as Dawn closed the door behind her and Jason laughed. Gary simply rolled his eyes.
“I don’t think I’ll be sticking to your advice with this one mate,” he said, rubbing at his cheek self-consciously. A yawn then interrupted their banter.
“I swear you only just left,” Howard said tiredly as Mark, Gary and Jason all turned to face him.
“You may want to check a clock on that one mate,” Gary replied as Howard pulled himself to his feet and came to join the other three men.
“Gaz…is that lipstick?” Howard frowned.
When Emma returned with Willow in her arms, they all made their way to the door once more. Each of the men gave Emma a polite kiss on the cheek as she bid them goodnight before she swiftly went out to put Willow in the car. Gary then turned to the three men left in his hallway, offering out his arms as an invite for one of them to take the first hug of goodnight. But instead the three men exchanged a playful glance, stepping forward as one.
“Mwah!” they exclaimed in perfect harmony, each blowing him a kiss before collapsing into laughter. Try as he might Gary couldn’t hold back his own smirk. Eventually, they relented, each embracing him with a warm ‘Goodnight’ and finally heading out to their cars.
“Red is definitely your colour Gaz,” Mark beamed jokingly over Gary’s shoulder before he too walked away.