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The Complete Fic Directory
- All I Do Each Night Is Rehearse The Pray Routine
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- Better Than Today - Kylie Minogue
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- Enemies
- Family
- Fine Time To Lose Your Mind - Jack McManus
- Fireworks
- Flat Tyres And Palm Prints [Birth]
- Flu
- Friends: A Dictionary [Friends]
- From Angels To The Moon/The Soup
- Green Light [Green]
- Hell Raisers
- Home Invasion
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- In My Veins
- Insides
- It Was The Death Of Something [Death]
- Just Like Children [Children]
- Kiss And Make Up
- The Last Time
- Lonely At Christmas
- Love Songs
- Lovers
- Middles
- Midnight Sun
- Mistletoe
- Months Go By [Months]
- More Important Than Fear
- Muddied Stars [Brown]
- Not Enough
- Of Peacocks
- On The Subject Of Angels [Orange]
- Playing House [Parents]
- The Price Of Friendship
- The Prize
- Post-Match Analysis
- Puddles
- Red
- Secret Admirer
- Secret Agent Owen
- Shades
- Shine - Skies Of America
- Slow Dancing In A Burning Room
- Snap
- So Good To See You
- Stage Fright
- Stay (Oh Darlin')
- Study In Motion
- Summertime Feeling - S Club 7
- Sunrise
- Sunset
- Teammates
- That Night In Amsterdam/Do You Love Me? [Part Two]
- This
- Three Sets Of Three
- Twenty-Nine (And A Half)
- Under A Colourless Sky [Colourless]
- We Found Something That Belongs To You [Outsides]
- We Were Strangers Once [Strangers]
- Weeks
- What Did You Say This Time?
- What Will The Papers Say? [Purple]
- White Out [White]
- The Wordsmith/Breathe In
- Years
- Yellow
- Yesterday's Promise
- 3-0 Defeats
- Barlow's Music Shop Series
- Fanfiction Challenges
- The Postcard Prompts
- OT3, OT4 & OT5
- Stories By Band Member
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Family
What’s the secret? I dunno. You know…we dismiss it a lot, I think. We’ve put it down to a lot of things really. I think Gaz might’ve said laughs a couple of times. I know we’ve all said friendship a lot. Magic, Howard calls it. Laughter plays a part I suppose. There’s a lot that’s been shared…and once it reaches a certain point you can’t ever get away from that kind of thing. But I’d probably go with it being a bit more than that…I don’t know what it is…but…to put it in a different way…it’s unidentifiable. We all have feelings like that, that are always there but we don’t know what they are. You know what I mean? It’s just…there. We were just typical young lads in the early days, there was a hell of a lot of love around but none of us ever mentioned it. I think if Gaz had ever told me he loved me I might’ve smacked him…or at least asked him what he was on. We would’ve taken the piss for weeks. Maybe Mark’s the exception to that…but Mark can get away with anything with us lot. I think it takes something big to change that though. Blokes don’t talk to each other like we do. There are even brothers and fathers too shy to be as honest as we can be. But I think it takes real trauma to learn how to be that honest. There were a lot of scars left after Take That, for all of us, even Gaz. There were a lot of things that weren’t dealt with. Or…to put that a different way…it all felt a bit like unfinished business. When we really talked about it all, we realised there was a lot of rubbish, a lot of bullshit. But then there was a lot of stuff that hadn’t been said too, a lot of things that we’d never actually realised maybe. When we’d dealt with it all we started to see that behind all the crap was a really solid friendship. Something we weren’t prepared to throw away in such a hurry. I’m probably the most negative, if I’m honest. I’m the one who’ll finish a show and a couple of hours later sit there and say that it’ll probably all be gone again someday. Howard’s the dreamer – he thinks big our Howard and I always feel a bit like I’m bursting a bubble when I say stuff like that to him. Mark and Gaz are somewhere in the middle and they balance it out. Something we’re all agreed on is that, no matter what else comes or goes, us four will still be sticking by each other. It’s a lovely realisation to come to – for four blokes especially. Coz blokes don’t realise these things ‘til it’s too late do they? You know what I mean? It’s just not what blokes do. But we learnt our lessons, grew up a bit. And we realised we needed each other. We don’t say it aloud that often, we do keep some of our masculinity! But we’re not afraid of the odd ‘I love you’ when it’s no one but us, you know? Sounds gay that doesn’t it – it’s funny to think we’re one of the only boybands without a ‘gay one’ when we’re just always all over each other! I look around our dressing room sometimes and it makes me laugh coz you’ll have me and Howard dancing round in just our underwear and over another side of the room there’ll be Mark giving Gaz a massage! It’s no wonder all our crew keep well clear before a show! But it’s nice, you know? Boundaries don’t really exist in our friendship. So I suppose the answer to your question…the secret to our second chance? Family. We’ve become a family. I can’t put my finger on when it happened or why it happened but…I know it’s probably one of the best things that could’ve happened for us. We had all reached points in our lives where a question of ‘what happens next?’ was beginning to be asked. Don’t get me wrong; we were all happy, all settled and content but…but I think we were all looking for…something. To rephrase that…we’d all grown up enough to know that it was the right time for revisiting the past. I don’t think any of us could’ve predicted what that meant for the future but I think we all knew that our lives as individuals couldn’t go forwards until we’d sorted out our past as a unit. And that’s what families do. In a family you all do your own thing but you always have these shared memories and they’re special. Nothing you can do can change the fact that you share your history with your family – and nothing can change the fact that I’ve shared a large part of my life with these three lads. But to be honest, I’m going to take the real cop out now, coz really our secret is a lot of things. Family is really more of a summing up of it…it’s love, it’s history…and fair few tears too I suppose. But it’s all there I guess…when you watch us, it’s not an act. All the hugs and the jokes, it’s us, it’s genuine. Maybe honesty is the secret instead…but you need that in a family too. I’d like to think that people recognise that honesty in us though, I’d like to think that’s quite a big part of our secret this time around too. Does that answer your question? [Laughs] You look baffled, would you like me to get one of the lads to translate?
[Laughs] God…that’s a question and a half! I know I should say it’s about the music…and it is, of course it is! But I know what you’re really getting at…look, the absolute fact to our success this time around has to, fundamentally, come down to the fact that people are buying the albums and the tickets and they’re enjoying it, but I think what you want to know is why we don’t all hate each other…because by rights we should all secretly loath each other by now and at least one of us really ought to be involved in a big old scandal but…we’re not. And the secret to that is definitely our relationship. I mean…I’ve known these lads for most of my life now, they’re as much a part of my family as my kids or my brother. I think we get asked a lot of the time about our friendship…especially when we first got back together. I think we fielded a lot of questions about how close we were and what our relationship was like with each other and I think maybe the whole thing was still a bit too new to us for us to really get it across to people. I think we talked a lot about how much fun we were having being equals in the studio and how so much was left unfinished from the first time round. And that’s all still true but…well, it’s like Jay’s always reminding us; there’s a bit more to it than that. All of us clicked from day one, we lucked out that way I suppose. We shared the laughs and the madness together and we cared for each other a lot but we were too young to understand it. Definitely too young to really appreciate that people other than ourselves had feelings. I suppose I was most guilty of that. Too far up my arse at time to really appreciate what Dougie or Mark or Rob could be thinking or feeling about something. That’s probably a big part of why we drifted apart, it was just too much – every time you turned around there was Mark or Jay or me and you couldn’t get away from it. Add that to the fact that we were all so wrapped up in our own worlds…it was just a recipe for disaster. It’s a miracle that we didn’t hate each other by the time we split actually. But we didn’t. We still cared a lot and I think, even though we didn’t keep in close contact, it was reflected in the way in which we did keep in touch. We always had some idea of what the others were up to. Mark phoned me when he was drunk once too…you know someone’s still a mate when you’ve got a drunken call on your voicemail! I think the whole greatest hits thing probably worked miracles for us though. It forced us back together at the perfect time in our lives really. I remember before it all happened getting this phone call out the blue – Jay had sorted out his thoughts on everything…and when Jay sorts out his thoughts it will always give you a new perspective. Jay can do that to you. He can really take you out of yourself and make you look at situations in a whole new way. So after, when the documentary was happening, my mind was looking at things from the lads’ point of view. And they were all looking at the past from a grown-up point of view as well. We weren’t kids any more. Two of us actually had kids of our own at the point. We were old enough to really, properly get down to things and talk. And by the time the tour came around I think we all knew each other better than ever. We’d reached that point where you can come out with the soppiest line you’ve ever heard but no one will bat an eyelid. We’d gotten back to the point where hugs and kisses were just…what you did. But this time they were accompanied by these…unashamed declarations of friendship. I think Howard managed to reduced us to tears a couple of times. He can very profound can Dougie…and when we first came back it would floor us all. But now we’re all the same. We all come out with these philosophical comments…well, Jay will…and heartfelt compliments and we just…smile. And it’s enough. See, that’s what I mean about the family thing. With a member of your family, a smile can be enough. I think it’s because family are sort of…an extension of you. And to me that’s what the lads are. And also…you know you can completely relax with family. Nothing to hide, nothing to worry about. And maybe that’s what we were missing the first time round that’s probably come to be our secret to survival this time. There isn’t that barrier of hidden things or unsaid things. We’re just us. And we give each other space too! That’s an important one!! But that’s all I can say really to answer your question. I don’t think I can explain it any better to anyone who doesn’t know the feeling. But when you do know it, it’s a secret that’ll get you far. It’s a real strength…and it does wonders for your confidence. Family has no time for missed chances, when you realise that you’ve discovered our secret. I don’t know if that’s the answer you’re looking for, but it’s the truth. All the truth.
I can’t give you an answer that’ll be any use to you [Laughs]…I can’t say anything that can give you a headline. I’m not going to come out with ‘We’re secretly lovers’ or something that’ll shock anyone. It’ll all just be stuff we say all the time. We get accused of that a lot – fobbing people off I mean. The truth isn’t exciting enough I guess. But when we say that we’re best friends, that we have a laugh…it’s real. Maybe reality isn’t that interesting, I dunno. But I know that our secret is in the chemistry we have. We have our group huddles and our band meetings and we have a hell of a lot of love for each other. Take the piss all you like, we’re still gonna tell each other we love each other. We’re quite easy with that kind of thing. I think it takes a lot of people by surprise how comfortable we are. We’ve become like a little family really – it doesn’t matter what’s said, the other three will still always be there. There’s a bond there that’s unbreakable, you know? I’m gonna sound like a right prick if the others all told you ‘laughter’s the secret’ then buggered off aren’t I! But they know as well as I do that our friendship doesn’t really have the typical boundaries that most blokes keep. Mark and Gaz are probably the worst for it, because I don’t think Mark has boundaries with anyone really, everyone loves Mark and Mark loves ‘em all back! But in all seriousness, I don’t think you’ll find many blokes as quick to hug as we are. We’ll hug for anything, we’re easy! Happy, sad, whatever. That’s the family thing again though isn’t it…you know that your family will always be there for you no matter what you do or say. And it’s like that between the lads. It doesn’t matter if you sound ridiculous, they’ll still love you after you’ve said it. I think that’s a new thing between us though. We were always quite comfortable with the hugs and the love, we always felt like we shared something special. But we were too young back then to really realise it was ok to admit it. I think we thought that if we got too close that things would change somehow. I think maybe we thought that if we said any of it out loud then it would damage it, make it awkward somehow. Time apart was probably the perfect thing for us. Time away from fame as well, that was healthy. Because we all grew up enough to realise we could be absolute twats when we were younger. We made arses of ourselves, anything for attention. And we forgot that behind all the madness was actually something really special. Something that, I think, to a certain extent, we all really need in our lives. I think maybe all the crap we’ve shared together plays a part too. There’s no one else any of us can share a lot of our wildest memories with…no one else we can share the hardest with either. I think I probably had an easier time of it than the others, in a lot of ways, and I never realised how much Jay and Mark had been hurting sometimes. But now I know it all. I know everything they felt then and if they feel something now then I know about it. We all do. Everything’s laid out, all our cards are on the table and we deal with it all together. Like a family again I suppose. There’s still a lot of competition around. But we take it more lightly now. Me and Jay are the worst for that, we maybe get a bit too serious about it sometimes. But we’ve learnt our lessons, we don’t steak our friendship on a game of snap anymore. Jay wants to beat me at cards, I always want to jump higher than him, that’s just how it goes, it just our personalities and it’s how our friendship works. There’s a lot of piss-taking between the lot of us. But we all know that at the heart of it is a lot of love, nothing’s taken too seriously now. They’re my second family. I guess in a lot of ways they can be there for me more than my real family can – because they have a lot of the same experiences as me. Experiences my real family can’t understand. It’s a strange thing to say really, that you have two families. I think maybe that’s something that is always a bit of an elephant in the room when we see Rob. All five of us can be laughing and joking but…us four have this family unit, built on experiences that he’s shared and then, also, a lot of experiences he hasn’t. Maybe we’ve had more chance to grow up than he has. But I think that’s maybe why people are so divided about whether it should be just us four or all five. We know that’s there by the way…just coz we never mention it doesn’t mean we don’t know what people are saying. I think we don’t mention it because it confuses us too. I think maybe people are worried that the ‘secret’ actually just belongs to four of us, not all five. If you’re wanting me to tell you the future on that front too, then you’re looking at the wrong bloke. I don’t think any of us can tell you to be honest. The future holds a lot of things. And the secret to that future being bright will always be having Jay and Mark and Gaz as part of my family. I can’t give you a headline from that, but I can give you the truth, as simple or as boring as it might be.
You don’t hang about do you! Our secret? That’s a big thing to put a finger on, you know? I think you might be asking the wrong bloke to be honest. I’m not good at coming out with really profound things, I can’t give you some magical insight into our band. That’s for Jay or Howard…I just tend to be trusted with the sunny side, the jokes and the friendly comments. To be honest I don’t think I can say for sure we know what the secret is anyway, I can maybe give you a vague sort of picture but…I think the best things in life can’t really be identified, you know? I think maybe the best I can do is say…us. We’re the secret. [Laughs] I don’t mean us as individuals, I mean us together. You know…I think we’ve always had something special between us. Obviously if we didn’t have that we could never have gotten to where we are today. But I think finding each other again when we did was also really nice. It was good for us to have that space, time to grow. It was hard sometimes, being in Take That. You’d try and tell people the stress that came with that job and they’d just laugh at you. But you couldn’t tell each other either…I’m not sure why we didn’t though. I guess me and Rob used to…but he starting drifting away when it got really hard. And Gaz sacred me a bit. And then Jay and Howard were just…so much more grown up than me. It was tough. It was fun too, don’t get me wrong. It was a lot of fun. Those memories never leave you…the fact that we had shared them really sort of…bound us together for life too, you know? Once we’d really thrashed it all out and we’d all got some stuff off our chest…I think that’s when we really managed to become more than mates. We’re a bit of a family now actually. I mean…I’m like the baby of the family. They all look after me…it’s funny because I don’t always act like the baby. But they baby me anyway. I’m the baby brother that can’t do anything wrong – they let me get away with things I don’t think they’d tolerate from anyone else, bossing them around and everything. I’m in my own world a lot of the time too but they always just smile and roll their eyes. And they’re always going to protect me, even when I don’t need protecting I know they will, it’s just my role in the family. And then you’ve got Jay…he’s like dad…or maybe just big brother. He’s used to playing that part in his own family but he’s probably even worse with us lot. He’s really protective of us all, and really kind. I don’t think there’s anyone as kind as Jay. He lets us take the piss out of him day after day but he’ll still be the first one there with a cuppa when you’re ill! He’s always sensible too, even when he’s drunk Jay can come out with the most stupidly sensible stuff! So yeah, he’s dad to me. Maybe more like big brother to the others. But he’s still a real strength in the family though. Then you’ve got Howard…he’s just like that older cousin that you think is incredibly worldly wise even though he probably isn’t. He’s like…the one that always tells the most amazing jokes and takes you on amazing adventures and then gets you into trouble at the end of it! But you also know that if anything bad happens he’ll be there in no time, he can sort anything out can Howard. Which leaves Gaz…whose role in the family is probably the hardest to pinpoint I guess. You know…in many ways, Gaz can be your whole family rolled into one sometimes. But I’d have to say…he’s probably granddad! [Laughs] Or maybe he’s more like y’ Nan!! I love Gaz, a lot. He’s probably the secret to the secret, you know? He makes the family. Everything’s always cosy with Gaz. He really looks after all of us and he’s always there for you, really understanding and happy to make you a brew! I mean…all jokes aside, that’s my support unit through my life now. Friends can only look after you so much but…y’ family are always there aren’t they. And that’s what keeps us as strong as we are, that’s the secret to our strength as a band I think. You’re only as successful as your support system is strong. I think that’s something Jay said to me once actually. And he’s right. I don’t think any of us would be as happy as we are if it wasn’t for the knowledge that we have the kind of friendship that is so essential to a happy life. We have those mates who’ve become part of the furniture almost. And on top of that we’re not afraid to tell each other what we’re thinking or feeling. I’ve always been really honest about stuff like that. I think Jay has too. We’re both blokes who tend to just say how we feel and end up getting looks off our mates like we’d just lost our minds. [Laughs] But I think our friendship has brought that out of us even more. There’s nothing we can’t say to each other now. It’s funny to look back and think there was ever a time when it wasn’t like that. We’ve become a family now and it’s hard to think of family as ever not being there, you know? I’ve got me big brother, me naughty cousin and even me Nan with me all the time – only difference is I can get drunk with this Nan! It’s not much of a secret though is it? I think anyone who has seen us can tell, we’re not shy about it. That’s part of the secret too though. Never keep that kind of thing hidden, what’s the point in that! [Pauses] Is that answer ok? I’ll just stick to smiling and looking cute from now on then eh! [Laughs] I’ll leave the hard questions for Gaz!
[Laughs] God…that’s a question and a half! I know I should say it’s about the music…and it is, of course it is! But I know what you’re really getting at…look, the absolute fact to our success this time around has to, fundamentally, come down to the fact that people are buying the albums and the tickets and they’re enjoying it, but I think what you want to know is why we don’t all hate each other…because by rights we should all secretly loath each other by now and at least one of us really ought to be involved in a big old scandal but…we’re not. And the secret to that is definitely our relationship. I mean…I’ve known these lads for most of my life now, they’re as much a part of my family as my kids or my brother. I think we get asked a lot of the time about our friendship…especially when we first got back together. I think we fielded a lot of questions about how close we were and what our relationship was like with each other and I think maybe the whole thing was still a bit too new to us for us to really get it across to people. I think we talked a lot about how much fun we were having being equals in the studio and how so much was left unfinished from the first time round. And that’s all still true but…well, it’s like Jay’s always reminding us; there’s a bit more to it than that. All of us clicked from day one, we lucked out that way I suppose. We shared the laughs and the madness together and we cared for each other a lot but we were too young to understand it. Definitely too young to really appreciate that people other than ourselves had feelings. I suppose I was most guilty of that. Too far up my arse at time to really appreciate what Dougie or Mark or Rob could be thinking or feeling about something. That’s probably a big part of why we drifted apart, it was just too much – every time you turned around there was Mark or Jay or me and you couldn’t get away from it. Add that to the fact that we were all so wrapped up in our own worlds…it was just a recipe for disaster. It’s a miracle that we didn’t hate each other by the time we split actually. But we didn’t. We still cared a lot and I think, even though we didn’t keep in close contact, it was reflected in the way in which we did keep in touch. We always had some idea of what the others were up to. Mark phoned me when he was drunk once too…you know someone’s still a mate when you’ve got a drunken call on your voicemail! I think the whole greatest hits thing probably worked miracles for us though. It forced us back together at the perfect time in our lives really. I remember before it all happened getting this phone call out the blue – Jay had sorted out his thoughts on everything…and when Jay sorts out his thoughts it will always give you a new perspective. Jay can do that to you. He can really take you out of yourself and make you look at situations in a whole new way. So after, when the documentary was happening, my mind was looking at things from the lads’ point of view. And they were all looking at the past from a grown-up point of view as well. We weren’t kids any more. Two of us actually had kids of our own at the point. We were old enough to really, properly get down to things and talk. And by the time the tour came around I think we all knew each other better than ever. We’d reached that point where you can come out with the soppiest line you’ve ever heard but no one will bat an eyelid. We’d gotten back to the point where hugs and kisses were just…what you did. But this time they were accompanied by these…unashamed declarations of friendship. I think Howard managed to reduced us to tears a couple of times. He can very profound can Dougie…and when we first came back it would floor us all. But now we’re all the same. We all come out with these philosophical comments…well, Jay will…and heartfelt compliments and we just…smile. And it’s enough. See, that’s what I mean about the family thing. With a member of your family, a smile can be enough. I think it’s because family are sort of…an extension of you. And to me that’s what the lads are. And also…you know you can completely relax with family. Nothing to hide, nothing to worry about. And maybe that’s what we were missing the first time round that’s probably come to be our secret to survival this time. There isn’t that barrier of hidden things or unsaid things. We’re just us. And we give each other space too! That’s an important one!! But that’s all I can say really to answer your question. I don’t think I can explain it any better to anyone who doesn’t know the feeling. But when you do know it, it’s a secret that’ll get you far. It’s a real strength…and it does wonders for your confidence. Family has no time for missed chances, when you realise that you’ve discovered our secret. I don’t know if that’s the answer you’re looking for, but it’s the truth. All the truth.
I can’t give you an answer that’ll be any use to you [Laughs]…I can’t say anything that can give you a headline. I’m not going to come out with ‘We’re secretly lovers’ or something that’ll shock anyone. It’ll all just be stuff we say all the time. We get accused of that a lot – fobbing people off I mean. The truth isn’t exciting enough I guess. But when we say that we’re best friends, that we have a laugh…it’s real. Maybe reality isn’t that interesting, I dunno. But I know that our secret is in the chemistry we have. We have our group huddles and our band meetings and we have a hell of a lot of love for each other. Take the piss all you like, we’re still gonna tell each other we love each other. We’re quite easy with that kind of thing. I think it takes a lot of people by surprise how comfortable we are. We’ve become like a little family really – it doesn’t matter what’s said, the other three will still always be there. There’s a bond there that’s unbreakable, you know? I’m gonna sound like a right prick if the others all told you ‘laughter’s the secret’ then buggered off aren’t I! But they know as well as I do that our friendship doesn’t really have the typical boundaries that most blokes keep. Mark and Gaz are probably the worst for it, because I don’t think Mark has boundaries with anyone really, everyone loves Mark and Mark loves ‘em all back! But in all seriousness, I don’t think you’ll find many blokes as quick to hug as we are. We’ll hug for anything, we’re easy! Happy, sad, whatever. That’s the family thing again though isn’t it…you know that your family will always be there for you no matter what you do or say. And it’s like that between the lads. It doesn’t matter if you sound ridiculous, they’ll still love you after you’ve said it. I think that’s a new thing between us though. We were always quite comfortable with the hugs and the love, we always felt like we shared something special. But we were too young back then to really realise it was ok to admit it. I think we thought that if we got too close that things would change somehow. I think maybe we thought that if we said any of it out loud then it would damage it, make it awkward somehow. Time apart was probably the perfect thing for us. Time away from fame as well, that was healthy. Because we all grew up enough to realise we could be absolute twats when we were younger. We made arses of ourselves, anything for attention. And we forgot that behind all the madness was actually something really special. Something that, I think, to a certain extent, we all really need in our lives. I think maybe all the crap we’ve shared together plays a part too. There’s no one else any of us can share a lot of our wildest memories with…no one else we can share the hardest with either. I think I probably had an easier time of it than the others, in a lot of ways, and I never realised how much Jay and Mark had been hurting sometimes. But now I know it all. I know everything they felt then and if they feel something now then I know about it. We all do. Everything’s laid out, all our cards are on the table and we deal with it all together. Like a family again I suppose. There’s still a lot of competition around. But we take it more lightly now. Me and Jay are the worst for that, we maybe get a bit too serious about it sometimes. But we’ve learnt our lessons, we don’t steak our friendship on a game of snap anymore. Jay wants to beat me at cards, I always want to jump higher than him, that’s just how it goes, it just our personalities and it’s how our friendship works. There’s a lot of piss-taking between the lot of us. But we all know that at the heart of it is a lot of love, nothing’s taken too seriously now. They’re my second family. I guess in a lot of ways they can be there for me more than my real family can – because they have a lot of the same experiences as me. Experiences my real family can’t understand. It’s a strange thing to say really, that you have two families. I think maybe that’s something that is always a bit of an elephant in the room when we see Rob. All five of us can be laughing and joking but…us four have this family unit, built on experiences that he’s shared and then, also, a lot of experiences he hasn’t. Maybe we’ve had more chance to grow up than he has. But I think that’s maybe why people are so divided about whether it should be just us four or all five. We know that’s there by the way…just coz we never mention it doesn’t mean we don’t know what people are saying. I think we don’t mention it because it confuses us too. I think maybe people are worried that the ‘secret’ actually just belongs to four of us, not all five. If you’re wanting me to tell you the future on that front too, then you’re looking at the wrong bloke. I don’t think any of us can tell you to be honest. The future holds a lot of things. And the secret to that future being bright will always be having Jay and Mark and Gaz as part of my family. I can’t give you a headline from that, but I can give you the truth, as simple or as boring as it might be.
You don’t hang about do you! Our secret? That’s a big thing to put a finger on, you know? I think you might be asking the wrong bloke to be honest. I’m not good at coming out with really profound things, I can’t give you some magical insight into our band. That’s for Jay or Howard…I just tend to be trusted with the sunny side, the jokes and the friendly comments. To be honest I don’t think I can say for sure we know what the secret is anyway, I can maybe give you a vague sort of picture but…I think the best things in life can’t really be identified, you know? I think maybe the best I can do is say…us. We’re the secret. [Laughs] I don’t mean us as individuals, I mean us together. You know…I think we’ve always had something special between us. Obviously if we didn’t have that we could never have gotten to where we are today. But I think finding each other again when we did was also really nice. It was good for us to have that space, time to grow. It was hard sometimes, being in Take That. You’d try and tell people the stress that came with that job and they’d just laugh at you. But you couldn’t tell each other either…I’m not sure why we didn’t though. I guess me and Rob used to…but he starting drifting away when it got really hard. And Gaz sacred me a bit. And then Jay and Howard were just…so much more grown up than me. It was tough. It was fun too, don’t get me wrong. It was a lot of fun. Those memories never leave you…the fact that we had shared them really sort of…bound us together for life too, you know? Once we’d really thrashed it all out and we’d all got some stuff off our chest…I think that’s when we really managed to become more than mates. We’re a bit of a family now actually. I mean…I’m like the baby of the family. They all look after me…it’s funny because I don’t always act like the baby. But they baby me anyway. I’m the baby brother that can’t do anything wrong – they let me get away with things I don’t think they’d tolerate from anyone else, bossing them around and everything. I’m in my own world a lot of the time too but they always just smile and roll their eyes. And they’re always going to protect me, even when I don’t need protecting I know they will, it’s just my role in the family. And then you’ve got Jay…he’s like dad…or maybe just big brother. He’s used to playing that part in his own family but he’s probably even worse with us lot. He’s really protective of us all, and really kind. I don’t think there’s anyone as kind as Jay. He lets us take the piss out of him day after day but he’ll still be the first one there with a cuppa when you’re ill! He’s always sensible too, even when he’s drunk Jay can come out with the most stupidly sensible stuff! So yeah, he’s dad to me. Maybe more like big brother to the others. But he’s still a real strength in the family though. Then you’ve got Howard…he’s just like that older cousin that you think is incredibly worldly wise even though he probably isn’t. He’s like…the one that always tells the most amazing jokes and takes you on amazing adventures and then gets you into trouble at the end of it! But you also know that if anything bad happens he’ll be there in no time, he can sort anything out can Howard. Which leaves Gaz…whose role in the family is probably the hardest to pinpoint I guess. You know…in many ways, Gaz can be your whole family rolled into one sometimes. But I’d have to say…he’s probably granddad! [Laughs] Or maybe he’s more like y’ Nan!! I love Gaz, a lot. He’s probably the secret to the secret, you know? He makes the family. Everything’s always cosy with Gaz. He really looks after all of us and he’s always there for you, really understanding and happy to make you a brew! I mean…all jokes aside, that’s my support unit through my life now. Friends can only look after you so much but…y’ family are always there aren’t they. And that’s what keeps us as strong as we are, that’s the secret to our strength as a band I think. You’re only as successful as your support system is strong. I think that’s something Jay said to me once actually. And he’s right. I don’t think any of us would be as happy as we are if it wasn’t for the knowledge that we have the kind of friendship that is so essential to a happy life. We have those mates who’ve become part of the furniture almost. And on top of that we’re not afraid to tell each other what we’re thinking or feeling. I’ve always been really honest about stuff like that. I think Jay has too. We’re both blokes who tend to just say how we feel and end up getting looks off our mates like we’d just lost our minds. [Laughs] But I think our friendship has brought that out of us even more. There’s nothing we can’t say to each other now. It’s funny to look back and think there was ever a time when it wasn’t like that. We’ve become a family now and it’s hard to think of family as ever not being there, you know? I’ve got me big brother, me naughty cousin and even me Nan with me all the time – only difference is I can get drunk with this Nan! It’s not much of a secret though is it? I think anyone who has seen us can tell, we’re not shy about it. That’s part of the secret too though. Never keep that kind of thing hidden, what’s the point in that! [Pauses] Is that answer ok? I’ll just stick to smiling and looking cute from now on then eh! [Laughs] I’ll leave the hard questions for Gaz!