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The Complete Fic Directory
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- Fine Time To Lose Your Mind - Jack McManus
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- Friends: A Dictionary [Friends]
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- The Price Of Friendship
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FriendS: A Dictionary [Friends]
Essential Phrases For The Take That Traveller – Foreword:
This essential collection of sayings are translated from a language known only between bandmates. The only pocket book of its kind, it was compiled in order to assist the bystander and outsider in understanding what is unfolding before them should they find themselves in the company of four true friends known by the names of Gary Barlow, Howard Donald, Jason Orange and Mark Owen….
Chapter 1 – Everyday Greeting.
Alright mate: You have no idea how happy I am to see you.
Mornin’: If you talk to me now, I won’t take it in, it’s far too early.
Evenin’: I’ve got a good feeling about tonight.
Ayyyyy: I’ve not seen you for far too long – come here right now and give me a hug.
Chapter Two – Hotels.
Bit posh this: How the hell did four Northern blokes end up in this place?!
Bloody hell Markie: Mark, your room is a tip! How do you find anything in here?!
Jay…: Can I come in your room tonight, I’m lonely and you have camomile tea.
You seen Mark?: We’ll be running late today.
Can’t sleep: Can we talk?
This is stupid: Four grown men should not fit in this bed…but I’m not going to move first.
Chapter Three – Dealing with Authority.
You twit!: What are you like?!
Fuck off!: Alright, if you stop smothering me then you can have a hug!
You’re a bit big headed aren’t ya: You don’t half make me smile when you do that.
Shurrup Gaz!: Wait a bit and we’ll go back to your lyrics when ours have completely failed!
Give over: Put yourself down again and I’m coming over there and hugging you to death!
Shh!: If we can stop laughing for long enough we might actually pull this prank off.
Aww: You really are a beautiful person mate.
Chapter Four – Cars & Driving.
Do you even know where we’re going?: Don’t tell anyone but I love these misadventures.
Can you actually read maps?: I’m lost…shall we just ditch this interview and have a picnic?
We’ve lost Mark!: Step away from the car, we could be here some time.
Move over you lazy bastard!: Yes you can rest on my shoulder, just don’t fall asleep!
Where are we?: I admit it – I fell asleep.
Are we there yet?: Secretly, I’m five years old.
Sorry Marko, no such luck: To be honest Mark, we already knew you were five.
Chapter Five – Shopping.
What do you think?: Mark, you’re good at this stuff – HELP!
I’m having that: It’s pointless and extravagant…but…every man deserves a treat now and then.
What a beauty: Yes. Yes it is another piano.
Can you even work that?!: Jay put it down, you can’t even work a toaster that’s too high tech!
Needs a polish: I’m taking the piss out of your new guitar mate, just coz I can.
Wow: I’m jealous…incredibly jealous.
Chapter Six – Bars & Pubs.
One for the road lads?: Fancy making this a proper mash up lads?
Come ‘ere you: I’m officially drunk enough to dance with you now.
I need another drink: I think what just happened is best forgotten.
Oh come on Jay: We want you to be as hungover as we are tomorrow morning.
Eh up, here we go again: Mark’s tipsy…prepare for the nonsense lads.
Lovely: I’m too drunk to pass sensible comment.
Give us a kiss!: I’m drunk and overly affectionate, but I love you when I’m sober too.
I’m going to regret this tomorrow: One more drink if you promise to be gentle in the morning.
Chapter Seven – Food & Drink.
Fancy a cuppa?: I’m making tea so sit y’self down and we’ll have a nice old natter.
I need coffee: Please look after me today…and no talking before caffeine is found.
Fancy a biscuit?: Come on Gaz, one can’t hurt – it’ll cheer you up!
Where do you put all that?: How are you so skinny?
Go on Marko: You might as well mate, we all know you still won’t grow!
Jay you’re ridiculous: Stop eating fruit and have some cake like the rest of us!
I’m watching you Shorty!: Yes Mark, I will notice if you steal my biscuits.
Chapter Nine – Holidays & Outings.
I’m off tomorrow: I’m going to miss you like hell.
I’ve missed you so much!: I know we said we should take a break but…we never stick to that.
It’d be simpler if we just drove ourselves there: D’ya know, I just fancy a road trip…
Time for a holiday: When we start talking in unison, it gets a bit too much like a marriage.
It’s beautiful here: It’s beautiful here with you.
Listen, Jay, mate…: Yes, yes I am going to ask you for some last minute babysitting. Again.
Chapter Ten – Important Colours.
Nice to see you smiling: Gold.
Nah, the lads went home: Blue.
Give us a cuddle: Purple.
Bye then: Grey.
Chapter Eleven – Important Dates.
1990: The beginning of a friendship…and the rest of our lives.
1996: What didn’t kill us made us stronger – there are no highs without the lows.
2006: True friendship can always click back into place.
2009: A lovely realisation that we are dependent on each other.
Chapter Twelve – Important Numbers.
Four: In this friendship, there are no other numbers…and ‘one’ is simply unheard of.
Chapter Thirteen – Dealing with Problems.
Hey, what’s wrong?: Please don’t cry, please don’t ever cry…I hate to see you cry…
Come on: Cheer up, it’ll be ok.
If you want…: I’d give anything for you to smile right now.
I’m all ears: I’m always here for you mate – middle of the night, middle of a show…whenever.
Give me a hug: I can’t make it all better but I can look after you at the very least.
You soppy git: Ok, so you’re still miserable, but we’re going to carry on trying to cheer you up.
You ready mate?: Despite your boasting I know you’re terrified…and we’re here if you need us.
Section Fifteen: Essential Phrases
Gaz: I love you.
Howard: I love you.
Jay: I love you.
Markie: I love you.
Lads: True friends.
This essential collection of sayings are translated from a language known only between bandmates. The only pocket book of its kind, it was compiled in order to assist the bystander and outsider in understanding what is unfolding before them should they find themselves in the company of four true friends known by the names of Gary Barlow, Howard Donald, Jason Orange and Mark Owen….
Chapter 1 – Everyday Greeting.
Alright mate: You have no idea how happy I am to see you.
Mornin’: If you talk to me now, I won’t take it in, it’s far too early.
Evenin’: I’ve got a good feeling about tonight.
Ayyyyy: I’ve not seen you for far too long – come here right now and give me a hug.
Chapter Two – Hotels.
Bit posh this: How the hell did four Northern blokes end up in this place?!
Bloody hell Markie: Mark, your room is a tip! How do you find anything in here?!
Jay…: Can I come in your room tonight, I’m lonely and you have camomile tea.
You seen Mark?: We’ll be running late today.
Can’t sleep: Can we talk?
This is stupid: Four grown men should not fit in this bed…but I’m not going to move first.
Chapter Three – Dealing with Authority.
You twit!: What are you like?!
Fuck off!: Alright, if you stop smothering me then you can have a hug!
You’re a bit big headed aren’t ya: You don’t half make me smile when you do that.
Shurrup Gaz!: Wait a bit and we’ll go back to your lyrics when ours have completely failed!
Give over: Put yourself down again and I’m coming over there and hugging you to death!
Shh!: If we can stop laughing for long enough we might actually pull this prank off.
Aww: You really are a beautiful person mate.
Chapter Four – Cars & Driving.
Do you even know where we’re going?: Don’t tell anyone but I love these misadventures.
Can you actually read maps?: I’m lost…shall we just ditch this interview and have a picnic?
We’ve lost Mark!: Step away from the car, we could be here some time.
Move over you lazy bastard!: Yes you can rest on my shoulder, just don’t fall asleep!
Where are we?: I admit it – I fell asleep.
Are we there yet?: Secretly, I’m five years old.
Sorry Marko, no such luck: To be honest Mark, we already knew you were five.
Chapter Five – Shopping.
What do you think?: Mark, you’re good at this stuff – HELP!
I’m having that: It’s pointless and extravagant…but…every man deserves a treat now and then.
What a beauty: Yes. Yes it is another piano.
Can you even work that?!: Jay put it down, you can’t even work a toaster that’s too high tech!
Needs a polish: I’m taking the piss out of your new guitar mate, just coz I can.
Wow: I’m jealous…incredibly jealous.
Chapter Six – Bars & Pubs.
One for the road lads?: Fancy making this a proper mash up lads?
Come ‘ere you: I’m officially drunk enough to dance with you now.
I need another drink: I think what just happened is best forgotten.
Oh come on Jay: We want you to be as hungover as we are tomorrow morning.
Eh up, here we go again: Mark’s tipsy…prepare for the nonsense lads.
Lovely: I’m too drunk to pass sensible comment.
Give us a kiss!: I’m drunk and overly affectionate, but I love you when I’m sober too.
I’m going to regret this tomorrow: One more drink if you promise to be gentle in the morning.
Chapter Seven – Food & Drink.
Fancy a cuppa?: I’m making tea so sit y’self down and we’ll have a nice old natter.
I need coffee: Please look after me today…and no talking before caffeine is found.
Fancy a biscuit?: Come on Gaz, one can’t hurt – it’ll cheer you up!
Where do you put all that?: How are you so skinny?
Go on Marko: You might as well mate, we all know you still won’t grow!
Jay you’re ridiculous: Stop eating fruit and have some cake like the rest of us!
I’m watching you Shorty!: Yes Mark, I will notice if you steal my biscuits.
Chapter Nine – Holidays & Outings.
I’m off tomorrow: I’m going to miss you like hell.
I’ve missed you so much!: I know we said we should take a break but…we never stick to that.
It’d be simpler if we just drove ourselves there: D’ya know, I just fancy a road trip…
Time for a holiday: When we start talking in unison, it gets a bit too much like a marriage.
It’s beautiful here: It’s beautiful here with you.
Listen, Jay, mate…: Yes, yes I am going to ask you for some last minute babysitting. Again.
Chapter Ten – Important Colours.
Nice to see you smiling: Gold.
Nah, the lads went home: Blue.
Give us a cuddle: Purple.
Bye then: Grey.
Chapter Eleven – Important Dates.
1990: The beginning of a friendship…and the rest of our lives.
1996: What didn’t kill us made us stronger – there are no highs without the lows.
2006: True friendship can always click back into place.
2009: A lovely realisation that we are dependent on each other.
Chapter Twelve – Important Numbers.
Four: In this friendship, there are no other numbers…and ‘one’ is simply unheard of.
Chapter Thirteen – Dealing with Problems.
Hey, what’s wrong?: Please don’t cry, please don’t ever cry…I hate to see you cry…
Come on: Cheer up, it’ll be ok.
If you want…: I’d give anything for you to smile right now.
I’m all ears: I’m always here for you mate – middle of the night, middle of a show…whenever.
Give me a hug: I can’t make it all better but I can look after you at the very least.
You soppy git: Ok, so you’re still miserable, but we’re going to carry on trying to cheer you up.
You ready mate?: Despite your boasting I know you’re terrified…and we’re here if you need us.
Section Fifteen: Essential Phrases
Gaz: I love you.
Howard: I love you.
Jay: I love you.
Markie: I love you.
Lads: True friends.